By allowing people (whether they are mentally healthy or not) to simply be themselves, we take so much pressure of them, ourselves, and our relationship. If we simply help people to follow their path instead of “helping” them follow a path we think is right, we can create a much better world.
Most of us have a decent enough self-awareness to know what makes us different from “the norm”. Tall people know they are tall. Short people know they are short. If someone is 6ft 11ins they don’t need to go to a clothing store to be told “Wow, you don’t fit in normal sized clothes.” It’s not helpful.
For all the advancements, added names for disorders to diagnose, self-help manuals, DSM editions, training, degrees, research etc, we all have well-meaning friends (WMFs) with the same mindset as a 7-year old cartoon character from the 1950s.
There is no magic button to instantly remove old habits and program new ones. It takes time, and as we work on new patterns stress is still happening.
Sometimes it is very easy to look at the one heavy burden causing the majority of stress, and we fail to see the many smaller items that are adding to the strain.
We are constantly in a state of stress. There is always a change or a demand on us. Sometimes it is good, sometimes bad, sometimes neutral. Stress is normal.
In our individualistic world we lose sight of the fact that we are all interconnected and need each other. We don’t lose anything by trying to help someone else, and yet we can gain so much.
Your goals may have changed, and some of what you once wanted to achieve may not be realistic anymore. That doesn’t mean you cannot still have value, purpose, and achieve goals you are passionate about.
The Stanford Prison Experiment showed how easy it is for someone to feel trapped and like a prisoner when they have all the freedom in the world. How often do we feel trapped and without options?